jeez man

Haha, remember that time I complained that this kibbutz was boring?

Well, it’s been an exiting 48 hours. You know “Nice French Girl?” Um, yeah, she just got kicked off the kibbutz. For slashing the screen on “The Americans” windows. Because she thought one of them stole her jeans. Which they didn’t.

It was a horrible 48 hours for me because I was the only one who actually knew for a fact it was her and I had to decide if I wanted to be the loyal friend or the person who tells the truth. If I had to say I value things above everything else, it’s doing “the right thing,” telling the truth, and being loyal. And obviously being loyal conflicted with doing the right thing and telling the truth. But since the girl wanted me to help her in destroying other people’s shit—she would not drop it, she just kept asking me AGAIN AND AGAIN to help her destroy “The Americans’” shit--I decided it wasn’t worth being a loyal friend in this case. I decided I wasn’t going to tell on the girl, but I decided that once the damage was discovered I would have to tell the truth about what happened. So immediately after discovering the torn screen, one of “The Americans” said to me, “It was [Nice French Girl], wasn’t it?” But the “wasn’t it” wasn’t even a question. They knew it. So I simply said, “You’re right.” But I still feel terrible. I feel like I should have called “The Americans” before they even discovered it (they were away for the weekend) because I had their numbers, but at the same time I feel like I should have made it clearer to the girl that I wasn’t going to keep that secret for her—I never said I would, but I also never outright said, “No, I’m not going to lie for you.” I’m just really pissed off that she kind of dragged me into all this shit with her.

When the friend I hit first discovered the window (it’s not his room), he said to me, “You see what your ‘Best Friend’ did????” As if I had something to do with all of this. As if I were responsible for this girl’s behavior, and if I were personally involved with what happened. It’s so frustrating for me because I was just trying to be nice. I was just trying to be helpful to a girl who couldn’t speak a common language with anyone else and who didn’t have other friends. And I get it thrown back in my face.


Anyway. More about this army shit. Jesus, I don’t even know what I’d want to do! Any suggestions? Home Front Command sounded interesting (I don’t know what they are in Hebrew, but they have orange berets….), or I don’t know. Jesus, I don’t even know what the options are! I’ll have to start researching this I guess.

I can’t tell my parents that I have to do the army until AFTER my citizenship papers go through. Why? Well, if they don’t want me to do the army, they’ll make me come home. How can they make me come home? By cutting me off financially before I have citizenship, before I can legally work in this country. So we’re gonna wait to drop that bomb on them.

I have several options for when I tell them:
1) The day I get my citizenship approved.
2) When they come visit me.
3) When I’m in basic training.
4) Immediately after the army induction ceremony.
5) [If I join the paratroopers—which I won’t], immediately before jumping out of a plane.

Oh, alas, if only I were a guy who were really physically fit! I’d totally do paratroopers just for the opportunity to call my parents right before I jump out of a plane and be like, “Oh, by the way, I totally just fucking joined the Israeli army and I’m jumping out of a fucking plane right now.”

Oh, WORD!