Soundtrack of My Life

First of all, I’m thinking of starting a celebrity gossip blog where I just blatantly make shit up about celebrities.

Second: I have the room to myself this weekend. I’m thinking of taking this opportunity to learn the dance to the “Thriller” music video. Any support?

Third: Okay, the whole “Chariots of Fire” life soundtrack thing just goes to show you that my life is boring. I need to spice things up. My life needs a soundtrack and I’ve decided that I’m actually going to make one.

With the help of John Williams and others, I’m going to come up with a complete list of songs I need for the day, and when I’m done I’ll make a playlist and wear headphones all day. This list is mostly for my benefit, as I don’t expect any reader to be familiar with every single song off the top of his head….although feel free to youtube these songs if you wanna know what my life sounds like.



Waking up in the morning/turning on the water heater: The Star Wars Theme.

Eating breakfast/reflecting on my life at the same time: “What a Wonderful World” by that fat Hawaiian dude

Walking from my apartment to the bus stop: Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah

Riding the bus to my job in the tourist shop: Indiana Jones Theme. (hey, I’m coming from East Jerusalem, that’s pretty exotic and Indiana Jones-worthy)

Walking from the bus stop to work, down Ben Yehuda Street: The Jurassic Park Theme

Whenever this person I dislike comes near me at work: The Jaws Theme.

Sitting by myself during Shabbat while everyone else on the planet is with their family: “Somewhere in My Memory” from Home Alone.

Whenever I sneakily throw the trash from my apartment into the trashcans in the lobby of this building instead of into the dumpster (which is farther away) like I’m supposed to: The James Bond Theme.

Any time my roommate says something extremely American like “hamburger” or “cool” in a French accent: “Ces soirees-la” from Jersey Boys.

Whenever I walk by the Lishkat Giyus (Army Enlistment Center) and I see hundreds of Haredi men standing outside trying to get exemptions: “Tradition” from Fiddler on the Roof.

Whenever I hear my roommate having an emotional conversation on the phone with her boyfriend: “Sometimes When We Touch” by Dan Hill

Whenever the boys at work are nice to me: “Consider Yourself” from Oliver!

Immediately after successfully selling a t-shirt: the last minute or so of “I Believe I Can Fly” by R. Kelly

Whenever I get really bored during work and start dancing to the radio music: “SexyBack.”

Immediately after dealing with Israeli government bureaucracy successfully: the last minute or so of “You Raise Me Up” by Josh Groban

Whenever orthodox families come into the store with their million children and try to order a million things at once: a techno remix of that Moshiach song.

Whenever I walk up the hill to the beautiful look-out point near my apartment, where you can see all of Jerusalem: “Jerusalem of Gold” sung by Ofra Haza

Whenever I have a nostalgic, sad, whatever moment: “Catch the Wind” by Donovan or “Edelweiss” from the Sound of Music

Whenever I come to eat in the dining hall and I realize that I don’t know anyone else in the room and I feel like a total weirdo: “The Phantom of the Opera”

Whenever I wind down and sit around in the evenings doing sudoku in bed: “Ketchy Shuby” by Peter Tosh

Whenever I turn off the lights for the night and let orange glow of Jerusalem come into my room as I say prayers and drift off to sleep: “When You Wish Upon a Star”

Whenever I feel that I can’t understand anything someone is saying to me in Hebrew: the Welsh national anthem.


Any time I have a moment where I feel like I’m actually fitting into this country?

“Brigadoon” from Brigadoon…..because we all know moments like that are as rare as Brigadoon coming out of the mists.