The U.N.

Friday Night Reflections:

So you think you live in a rough part of town or a tough neighborhood? Well, there’s U.N. peacekeeping base up the street from my apartment! Oh, you think you’re badass cos the police have to patrol your streets? I have the motherfucking U.N. patrolling my streets in their white U.N. trucks!


Also, I’m beginning to find that it’s hard being the youngest person in the ulpan. First off, none of the other girls qualify for obligatory army service, so I have no one else in the same boat…..and second off, I keep having conversations that go like this:

Friendly convo, friendly convo, small talk, small talk, then…
Girl I’m talking to: So what were you doing before you moved here?
Sam: Well, I was doing a couple years in college, but dropped out to come here…. How about yourself?
Girl: Oh. Oh wow. You’re young. I was finishing up my PhD.

There was also another awkward moment during Kiddush tonight when it was pointed out that I was the only one at the table and likely even the whole room who could not legally drink this same wine back in the U.S.

Another “girl” I was talking to today wasn’t even born in the same fucking decade.


Also, on this blog I’ve frequently stated that I have absolutely no family in Israel. Well, dear readers (all one of you….), it turns out I’ve been lying all along. Actually, it’s not lying if you don’t know any better. A cousin of mine (technically 2nd cousin I guess) told me yesterday on facebook that we have another cousin here in Israel, not too far from Jerusalem. How am I related to this person (and, by extension, his children and grandchildren)?
His mother and my great-grandmother were sisters.
So he and my grandma are cousins.
So I guess that makes his kids my mom’s second cousins I guess….?
And that makes his kids’ kids (apparently there’s like one 1 year old) my third cousins? Or what? I really don’t understand how this shit works.
Alls I know is, the most recent relative that we are both descended from are my great-great-grandparents.

THAT, dear readers (again, all one of you….unless you stopped reading this entry, Abraham), is my only family here in this country. And yes, I’m going to arrange meeting them. According to my cousin (who has actually met them), they’re very nice, so hopefully this will all work out nicely and not be horrendously awkward.

I’m also thinking that if I’m ever in need of more family here in Israel, I’ll just go door to door telling them that we have a great-grandma Sarah or Leah or Rachel or something in common, because as long as I got a name to match up then there’s no way they’d be able to tell I was lying.